Monday, July 26, 2010

Leo has lost two teeth

We're back from San Diego. We did all the kid things while we were there - Legoland, Sea World, the zoo, the kids' science museum. We all had a good time.

While we were there, the tooth that had barely been hanging on finally came out, after Leo played with it for what seemed like hours when he should have been asleep. He was a little scared of pulling out his tooth. Once he realized that it really didn't hurt, as we had been telling him for weeks, he pulled the second one out two days later. We did not lie to him and tell him that the Tooth Fairy would give him money if he put it next to his bed, so we gave him $5 for it. I insisted before he was born that I would never lie to a child of mine, so we don't have Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy.

I'm overdue in welcoming my newest follower, Brian. I don't know much about you, Brian, other than that you are "older." Older is relative, since I'm older than many of my followers and some of the people that I follow. I always ask if you want to introduce yourself and tell us about you.

I also wonder if anyone has been in contact with Jon, of The Rainbow Runner. When I tried to check his blog last night I was told that it no longer existed. I'll try again after posting this. I hope that Jon's OK.

Monday, July 19, 2010

"This car has more blind spots than Helen Keller", and buck fuddy

We're on vacation in San Diego. Very nice town. One of the few that I think "I could live here" when I visit. We're staying in a rented condo just on the border of Hillcrest, the "gayborhood." There are rainbow flags everywhere, and it definitely has a gay vibe. When we were logging into the condo's wifi network, another network that it detected was "buck fuddy." If you don't get the joke email me and I'll explain it.

We were supposed to get a Chevy Cobalt at the rental car company, but they must have been out because they gave us a free "upgrade" to an Impala. I realize that by American standards that may not be a large car, but it seems large to me. (I like small cars and drive a Honda Insight.) David doesn't like it for different reasons. His comment was "This car has more blind spots than Helen Keller." That's what I call a "David-ism", a unique comment that he makes that can be hilarious, or insulting, or often both. He once described a shopping trip with my mother and sister as "the Bataan death march with shopping bags."

We went to Legoland today. As amusement parks go it wasn't too bad. Leo played in a water area with lots of slides and things that shot water. He also enjoyed a ride where the riders on boats shot water out of guns at people walking by, and there were water guns for the people to shoot back. I manned one and made sure to soak any adult on a boat passing by. David thought that I enjoyed it too much, so he filmed it with the camcorder, with comments like "Here's my Buddhist, pacifist vegetarian husband soaking people with a water gun." Leo also enjoyed an enclosed two story game where kids on each level were shooting balls out of cannons at each other. I went in to talk to Leo, and I think every kid in there took aim at me. They must have thought "There's an adult, let's get him."

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Argentina, and the economy

Very early this morning local time, after debating for 14 hours, the Senate in Argentina approved a marriage equality bill. The President has promised to sign the bill, so Argentina now becomes the twelfth country on four continents to have marriage equality. This happened despite the Catholic and Mormon churches publicly opposing equality. Viva Argentina!

Meanwhile, here in the US, our Senate has decided to remove ENDA, the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, from the calendar of scheduled votes. (ENDA would prevent employers from firing a worker simply because he or she is gay, lesbian or transgendered - yes, that is still legal in most of the US.) With elections in November, the Senate is afraid to vote on anything controversial - like equality.

I got another reminder today of how the bad economy, and the screwed up US health care system, affect my patients. I saw a middle aged diabetic woman today who had her blood pressure, cholesterol and diabetes under good control last year. This year her diseases all all a lot worse. It turns out that her hours were cut back at work, so her paycheck is smaller, and her co payments for medications went up. So she can't afford two of her blood pressure medications or her insulin. But if she goes into a coma or has a stroke her hospitalization will be covered. How idiotic is that?

Sunday, July 11, 2010

40 and 19

Tomorrow my husband David turns 40. We aren't doing much to celebrate it, other than giving him gifts. He doesn't like to celebrate his birthday any year, so it isn't just because he's now in his 40s. He was traumatized by a birthday as a child. He invited several kids over to his birthday party one year, and no one showed up! He even called one kid the day before as a reminder of the party, and the kid assured David that he would be there. David was so upset that he never had another birthday party. The next year he started the tradition of just going out to dinner with his parents and one friend, but even that didn't go well. His parents drank too much at the restaurant (banana daiquiris - it was the 1970s), got mildly drunk and embarrassed him. I understand why he has an aversion to celebrating birthdays now.

Tuesday is the 19th anniversary of our first date. It's one of our three anniversaries, as I believe I mentioned in an earlier post. It's the one that we have celebrated the longest, and since marriage or even civil unions or domestic partnerships weren't available then it was the only date that we had to celebrate. We also celebrate what we call our "San Francisco anniversary", which is also Valentine's Day. It was the day in 2004 when we were married when the city of San Francisco was issuing marriage licenses to same sex couples, but that marriage was declared "null and void" by the California Supreme Court. We also celebrate the day of our "real" legal marriage in 2008, but we had been together for 17 years by then, so to us it was just not a huge deal at that point. I think that I want to have a party for our 20th anniversary next year. Not that many relationships, gay or straight, make it to 20 years, so I think that we should celebrate it.

Friday, July 9, 2010

the beginning of the end of DOMA?

Yesterday a federal district judge in Boston ruled in two cases that The Defense of Marriage Act or DOMA is unconstitutional. The first case was brought by the state of Massachusetts, which claimed that DOMA is unconstitutional because marriage laws are left to the states rather than the federal government under US law. The second case was brought by people legally married in Massachusetts who claimed that the federal government must treat all married people the same under federal law. The judge ruled in favor of the state and the couples (and three widows or widowers). This is a big deal, since most legal benefits of marriage come from federal rather than state law. The decisions will be appealed, first to the circuit court and then to the Supreme Court, which will take years. But I'm happy about the outcome. I would like my national government to recognize my valid marriage.

It was also pointed out to me that Oliver does have a blog, (Every time I try to make that a link that you can click on it doesn't work.) Welcome Oliver.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Happy Birthday to Canada and the US

Happy 143rd "birthday" to Canada and 234th to the US, both belated. Jimmy (the moose icon among my followers) reminded me of Canada Day recently - thanks Jimmy. I hope that your summer job on the railway in the Canadian Rockies is going well.

On the Fourth, Leo, David and I went over to Gareth and Analisa's (the couple that we're closest to) for their traditional barbecue. She was kind enough to grill vegetables for me, so I pigged out on eggplant. I really enjoy eggplant, while as David says "The best that I can say about eggplant in a dish is that it was well hidden." Leo enjoyed playing in their pool with their son Alec, and I enjoyed holding Kaylin, their 11 month old. She thinks that I'm funny when I make faces at her while she is in her mother's arms, but when I hold her she thinks that I'm someone to watch very closely for bad behavior.

On the Fourth I thought about the founding of my country. I visited Philadelphia a few years ago and took the tour to see the buildings and rooms where the Declaration of Independence was signed. It seemed to be a fitting room for our country - relatively small room, not at all ornate with unpainted wood plank floors. I also thought about the gay and lesbian soldiers who have died for a country that doesn't treat them as equals. When is Don't Ask, Don't Tell going to be repealed?

I have a new follower, and as is my custom, I want to welcome Oliver. I don't know anything about you, Oliver, since I didn't see a blog of your own or any biographical information. I invite you to introduce yourself and tell us about you. I've always liked the name Oliver, although Oliver North brought discredit to the name in the 1980s - you might not have even been alive then.

Friday, July 2, 2010


Ireland joined the growing group of countries that offer national recognition of same sex couples with passage of the Civil Partnership law. So the country that many of my ancestors came from, that was very conservative until recently, with laws against divorce and abortion, has now jumped ahead of the US in recognizing at least partial equality for gay and lesbian couples. I wonder why the Democratic party here, whose leader, our President, claims that he supports granting the same rights to same sex couples that married heterosexual couples have, hasn't introduced some form of national civil partnership. The Democrats want our votes and our money for their elections this fall, but where is their support for us? Maybe I should become a Green. I really agree with more of their agenda than the Democrats', but a vote for the Greens takes one away from the Democrats, which is almost the same as voting for a Republican - look at Florida in 2000 (thanks Ralph Nader) for proof.