Wednesday, February 10, 2010

pink and purple

Leo came home from first grade a while ago saying that pink and purple are "girl colors" and blue is a "boy color." Anyone who wears pink or purple is a girl, according to some of his male classmates. I thought about letting that comment slide, but David and I discussed it and decided that we were going to respond to the rigid gender stereotypes of American society. So the next day I deliberately wore a pink shirt and David wore a purple one. We asked Leo if we were girls. He of course said no. We pointed out the color of our shirts and asked if we wear pink or purple does that make us a girl? He again said no. So we had a discussion with him about colors just being colors, that people can wear whatever color they want. He's growing up with two dads, so I want to make sure that he doesn't accept that there are rigid limits on what a person can do based only on his or her sex.

To me, one of the best parts of being gay is that I can ignore any gender stereotypes that I want. I've already broken the biggest rule of what a man shouldn't do, to have sex with another man, and in my case, usually in the "woman's" role. I've realized that's a ridiculous rule, so why not break others? So I have a pink shirt that I wear to work on occasion. Why not? F*ck the rules.

9 comments:

  1. real men wear pink! actually one of my best female friends has a rule- she could never date a guy that doesn't feel comfortable wearing pink....

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  2. My daughter says similar things. Kindergarten aged kids want to put everything in a nice little box (except their toys, that is). It's funny to listen to the conversations they have with each other. Unfortunately - this is where they start learning what is acceptable, and what is okay to hate. Good for you for showing Leo that color does not determine sexual identity.

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  3. I like your approach to this situation. If only it were that easy to teach adults.

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  4. has ur son asked any questiona about having 2 dads? sorry if u have already talked about this.

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  5. I had a heated argument with my four-year-old niece once over my swim trunks. I told her I had a pair of pink swim trunks, 'cause I do. The conversation after went something like this:

    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    No, you don't!
    Yes, I do!
    NO YOU DO NOT! PINK IS FOR GIRLS; BLUE IS FOR BOYS!!!!!!

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  6. Thanks for the comments, guys. I wish that adults could be convinced as easily too, GMB.

    Arodomon, that's a good topic. I'll try to write a post on how we're raising Leo with two dads. It's not really a big deal.

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  7. Hear, hear! I love purple! Not so much pink, just makes me look ugly and accents my lousy skin color.

    Jay in VA

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